Change

Mood:  cramps, exhausted, OVERWHELMED, defeated...

As the "mood" section of this blog might indicate, I'm done in.  Yesterday was tiring at it's best moments and utterly defeating at it's worst.  I woke up earlier than I needed to by A LOT (which I did again today...YAY) and decided to get the morning rolling with Cait by walking Maddie.  Then packing.  And the stress began.  I think it's universal that the majority of humanity hates packing.  Perhaps I should specify...packing to move.  Packing for, say, Vegas is awesome.  Packing your life into boxes and bags and attempting to make some sense of all the "stuff" and "things" is...overwhelming.  And I always think I have WAY too much clothing (even though I can never find ANYTHING to wear) or candles or journals...you get the idea.  I have too much "stuff."

The thing that annoys me about it this time is that, when I moved to Iowa I literally took the BARE essentials.  I mean...we took two cars but Caitlyn and Mommy will attest to the fact that all totaled my packing amounted to probably half a car.  I really wasn't looking forward to the move...so I just...well I kind of didn't pack, hence taking nothing.  Yet a year later, getting ready to move into this tiny apartment I find I've amassed an entire wardrobe, too much jewelry (like I needed more), and so much random other crap that all I can do is stare at it, get upset and decide to do something else.

But yesterday Caitlyn and I actually made some really good progress on the packing thing.  We may be packing into trash bags...but we're moving 20 minutes away so I feel like class can be forgotten for a few minutes.  Anyway so we've already donated 3 overstuffed trash bags to Goodwill and are working on 2 more.  We packed up all of our pants and tank tops and shirts yesterday that we know we won't be wearing in the next week or so.  Feeling good about our progress (and the fact that we squeezed work and errands into the day) we headed to bed.

A few episodes into "How I Met Your Mother" the second season and a lot of laughter Caitlyn and I were feeling good.  Then the yelling began.  Not going into any detail, isn't it just the way of the world that some people can make you feel like the absolute smallest human being in, oh say, 4 or 5 words.  And while both of us know that we're only subject to current situation for a few more days...it killed our moods.  We sat, not speaking, and feeling miserable.  Helpless. 

Then I looked over at Cait and saw this:

 

And because my  mind works in incredibly weird ways this made me think of a Taylor Swift song I'd heard earlier in the day when I randomly put her playlist on  random on  my phone.  The song..."Change."  Get it?  Piggy bank...change?  Okay, anyway, so it's actually a beautiful song about overcoming and winning and triumph and today...THAT was my nice thing.   I believed the song.  I BELIEVE that things WILL change.  Starting with a move...which means a LOT more packing and upset and stress....but it's all for the better.

I KNOW this without a doubt.  "Cause these things will change."  

P to the S if you haven't heard the song.....here you go: