Monday Morning?

Mood:  case of the Mondays

For some reason, driving into work this morning this song was in my head.  And I know the title is Sunday Morning but...it's a rainy Monday morning and it was stuck in my head.  There's actually a reason too.

I've been thinking about my blog from last night since...well I posted it.  And one of the responses was from someone who will remain anonymous...but that told me it was my fault I was single.  Bear with me.  And implied that being single for 3 years was bad because since I don't like him...I'm too picky.  Or at least that's how the message came across to me.  Now, I'm not saying I'm not picky.  And I'm certainly not saying that I haven't been single for 3 years.  And I know it's my fault.  The only thing standing between myself and a relationship is...myself.  

At times that's a good thing.   I've needed a lot of the past 3 years to realize how much I put up with and why I did.  And how much I NEVER want to be that girl again.  I'm not a mother (yet) and I shouldn't have to be.  I DO deserve somebody to love me and that treats me with respect and equality...I'm still working on that one.  But I also need the butterflies.  The "Sunday monring" feeling.

It's one of the most famous quotes from Sex and the City and this song sums it up pretty well too...which is why it was in my head this morning:

Some people are settling down, some people are settling, and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.

And that's me.  That's an ongoing nice thing I have.  And one that I'm going to constantly remind myself of today.  I deserve butterflies.  I deserve "Sunday mornings" (which incidentally will NOT be Sundays as...I work) and I'm going to be single until I find that.  Because damn it...I'm worth it.  And I have to believe that true love exists somewhere out there...as much as it hurts to believe it and not have it sometimes...I will continue to hope.